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Relationship Therapists Review Ross and Rachel’s Relationship in ‘Friends’ | Vanity Fair

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From “The One Where Ross and Rachel Take a Break” to “The One Where Monica Sings,” relationship therapists Laura Heck and Zach Brittle break down Ross and Rachel’s relationship in ‘Friends’ and analyze their relationship dynamic, how they pivoted from fight to forgiveness, and how they evolved from season to season.

Laura Heck and Zach Brittle are certified Gottman therapists and relationship experts. As a public speaker and and author, respectively, their insights on therapy have reached the masses. Check out the institute they’re a part of and their Marriage Therapy podcast at the links below:

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Relationship Therapists Review Ross and Rachel’s Relationship in ‘Friends’ | Vanity Fair

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40 Comments

40 Comments

  1. 7 Horseshoes & A 4 Leaf Clover

    August 21, 2020 at 5:22 pm

    Ross left multiple women who were his intellectually equal, dumbed down his intellect to date Rachel, a beautiful dumb girl. Should’ve stayed with Julie; and Charlie didn’t have such low character to leave Ross for Greg Kinnear’s character after he dumped her. Then again, Ross was BO-RING! He would be considered the dumbest on Big Bang Theory.

    This show had its moments but it was NEVER really written very well. In this scene, Ross, has a PhD would ever be so dumb to interrupt her at work like this.

    • Talia Mason

      August 21, 2020 at 5:52 pm

      If you ask me Emily was the best for him.

    • insert name here

      August 21, 2020 at 6:10 pm

      ??? Rachel wasn’t dumb lol what

    • shabrina z

      August 21, 2020 at 6:59 pm

      I know a lot of friends with PhD that acts and thinks like Ross.
      Although it is weird that Ross never realy met anyone in his field.
      But If you know people at all. Those title dont realy mean anything on a persons social intelligence.

  2. Ryan Anthony

    August 21, 2020 at 5:27 pm

    Leopard print solves everything

  3. chester9966

    August 21, 2020 at 5:31 pm

    You should review Leonard and Penny’s relationship on Big Bang Theory.

  4. Talia Mason

    August 21, 2020 at 5:31 pm

    Should definitely look at Niles and Maris and Frasier and Lilith next. 😊

    • 7 Horseshoes & A 4 Leaf Clover

      August 21, 2020 at 5:48 pm

      Frasier and Lillith were HILARIOUS. A Freudian and a Jungian (I think).

  5. 7 Horseshoes & A 4 Leaf Clover

    August 21, 2020 at 5:33 pm

    Laura looks almsot JUST like Nicole Sullivan.

    https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005474/mediaviewer/rm507085056

  6. Ash. Ⓥ

    August 21, 2020 at 5:36 pm

    Wow

  7. Sofia Martellini Rosa

    August 21, 2020 at 5:36 pm

    Ok guys but the real question here is : *”WERE THEY ON A BREAK?!”*

    • Mehwish Owais

      August 21, 2020 at 6:30 pm

      No…the question is…what does ‘break’ mean?

    • loddi.jthinkle89

      August 21, 2020 at 6:32 pm

      Yes

    • Maritina Xánthe

      August 21, 2020 at 6:52 pm

      Yeah, they were lmfao

    • Nagy Gréta

      August 21, 2020 at 6:56 pm

      I dont get it because Rachel said that they should take a break and Ross agreed so here it is, and it was here the whole time YES THEY WERE ON A BREAK

    • MrPhebe9731

      August 21, 2020 at 7:36 pm

      To be fair yes they were on a break but Ross shouldn’t have hooked up with someone while they were still in the midst of getting their r/n sorted out.

  8. Ella Peebles

    August 21, 2020 at 5:38 pm

    i do love ross and rachel, but mondler were definitely the best couple in the whole show

    • 7 Horseshoes & A 4 Leaf Clover

      August 21, 2020 at 7:03 pm

      Mondler, hilarious. Sounds like the human version of mongrel; something bastardized that was constructed in a lab somewhere. They were the best couple that felt like a real couple and they seemed legitimately funny rather than forced.

  9. PrimeNumber19

    August 21, 2020 at 5:40 pm

    Ross never cheated. Calling it a betrayal automatically means Ross did a bad thing. No he didn’t, Rachel did by breaking up with him then saying, just kidding. That’s emotionally manipulative to the core.

    • janiqua

      August 21, 2020 at 6:26 pm

      The only emotional manipulation going on was Ross acting obsessive and controlling about who Rachel could be friends with. He deserved to be broken up with.

    • PrimeNumber19

      August 21, 2020 at 6:34 pm

      janiqua I don’t disagree for one second. But what he does while single is not Rachel’s business. And yes what he did was wrong before they broke, but what she did after that was wrong also.

  10. Kitteh of Interest

    August 21, 2020 at 5:41 pm

    Re: They didn’t understand what the break means… As much as I always thought this whole thing was wrong and Ross was totally in the wrong to run into another woman’s arms that night, Rachel totally meant what he thought she meant. The next morning, she wants to be his girlfriend again. They both knew “we were on a break,” but I find the ultimate question is if Ross should have been with someone on the night they broke up.

  11. Kitteh of Interest

    August 21, 2020 at 5:44 pm

    Incredible video. I know these scenes almost by heart due to watching them so much (we had the box sets but no cable back in the early Aughts) but these were some fresh and interesting ways to think about them!

  12. Wes K

    August 21, 2020 at 5:50 pm

    Two people with very different personalities at different points in their lives. Ross is established, while Rach is trying hard to establish her career.

  13. 7 Horseshoes & A 4 Leaf Clover

    August 21, 2020 at 5:53 pm

    EVEN The blonde woman at the 18 min mark clip seemed better for Ross than Rachel. I remember this episode and he casts her aside.

    • 7 Horseshoes & A 4 Leaf Clover

      August 21, 2020 at 5:54 pm

      Classic mistake of writers is to write guests stars as NICE people then mistakenly have the main characters act like assholes to them. We’re supposed to sympathize with the main characters.

  14. 7 Horseshoes & A 4 Leaf Clover

    August 21, 2020 at 5:57 pm

    Ross having babies with people and getting married a lot was an interesting flaw to his character though.

  15. E SL J

    August 21, 2020 at 6:01 pm

    Let’s be honest it was toxic

  16. flufftronable

    August 21, 2020 at 6:03 pm

    How hard is it to remember the assistants name is Sophie, you just watched it

  17. Sandra Roehrig

    August 21, 2020 at 6:27 pm

    Please do Lily and Marshall (HIMYM).

    • Nadia Jahani

      August 21, 2020 at 6:48 pm

      yesssssssss

    • Painter Lava Lamp

      August 21, 2020 at 6:51 pm

      I hated Lily

  18. Mehwish Owais

    August 21, 2020 at 6:30 pm

    Ross was a toddler.

  19. Charlie Smith

    August 21, 2020 at 6:41 pm

    ohmygosh i LOVE these two i started following their podcast after their first vanity video 💛

  20. Albert Silva

    August 21, 2020 at 6:48 pm

    Very nice

  21. TOstevo

    August 21, 2020 at 6:57 pm

    I’m surprised Zach didn’t mention that the actress at 17:41 looks EXACTLY like Laura.

  22. K Tierney

    August 21, 2020 at 7:16 pm

    Vanity fair protects pedos.

  23. Nagy Gréta

    August 21, 2020 at 7:16 pm

    Ok ok ok ok, but this is so professional and brilliant and talented acting, that i sometimes i think this was real

  24. Jessica Benedek

    August 21, 2020 at 7:24 pm

    Oh yay!!! Love your podcast, I was wondering when the new video was coming!!

  25. MrPhebe9731

    August 21, 2020 at 7:45 pm

    Taking notes for my future spouse.

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